Little Miss Fix-It

Last week a friend of mine blogged about having a very hard week.
Maybe there is something in the air.

I have this innate desire in me to fix things. As long as I can remember, I have felt it my personal duty to befriend everyone, give when everyone else has given up, love the unlovable, and be everything for everyone.
As you can imagine I have belittled and berated myself because I couldn't accomplish any of those things. Quite frankly I stink at fixing peoples problems (especially my own), but I cannot get ride of the inner most part of me that screams that I must do something, I must help.
These last two weeks have been tremendously difficult for me. As I watch some of the people I love the most, be faced with insurmountable pain and anguish. I have watched their lives crumble before them, and I don't know how to fix it. I don't know how to help them through their trials, I don't know how to help them feel like there is any hope. I'm not even sure there is any hope.....
I'm really not trying to be dramatic, because I recognize life will go on and that things will sort themselves out, I guess I was just hoping I could find something more positive to say (and think) other than, life will go on, and things will sort themselves out. Where is the joy in that?
There just isn't a silver lining along this set of dark clouds. Everyone's going to lose, and I cannot fix any of it.
Not only are my people "fix-it" skills falling apart, I also found out my fix it skills in general aren't what they used to be. Earlier today Alivia accidentally locked herself in our bathroom. I totally panicked when every attempt to pick the lock failed and my wild imagination went into overdrive. I called my sister, my mom and my husband, and nobody knew what to do. Dylan lovingly reminded me that Heavenly Father could fix it, so we sat down and prayed together.
After a few more unsuccessful attempts to unpick the lock, I sat down on the floor and bawled like a baby. (Luckily Alivia's a little more like her dad and instead of freaking out, she just laid down on the bathroom floor and took a nap.) In one last desperate attempt to pick the lock before I busted the door down, I found a little hex screwdriver and jammed it into the door knob as hard as I could and the darn thing popped right open (Hallelujah!!!) . My thanks to my Father in Heaven for always helping me out of trouble.

Serious family issues, bloody noses, throw-ups, babies locked in bathrooms, teaching Dylan's primary class again, speaking in sacrament meeting, elders quorum parties, activity day parties is just about all I can handle. Heres to next week may it hold something good and glorious. May it bring some peace and comfort. May it bring some solace to my troubled spirits.