My Valentines

Long long ago, I formed a really bitter attitude about Valentines Day.
To me it was/is the mother of all let downs. Many Valentine Days were wasted waiting for that special secret Valentines.
When I was a teenager I had this brilliant idea, and I thought myself so clever.  They say that what comes around goes around, right?  So I decided I would be the deliverer of secret Valentines.  I hoped to brighten others Valentines, while secretly thinking and hoping that I would push the fates into having someone do the same thing back to me.  (Shamefully, all those secret valentines I delivered, went to the cutest most popular boys in school instead of to people like me who really needed someone to make their Valentines special). 
IT DIDN'T WORK!
And I still think Valentines is the mother of all let downs. 
But I realized (thanks to some maturity and wisdom) why Valentines Day has been such a thorn in my side.
I was (and still am) a boring, homely, awkward fat girl.  I didn't feel like I fit in any where I went.  I desperately wanted and needed someone to tell me I was special.  And that validation never came.
I made Valentines Day about me.  I  spent every moment searching for someone or something to fill the emptiness in me and never once did it cross my mind that maybe I needed to be that person who reached out and made someone else feel good about themselves.
So in an effort to ride myself of Valentines bitterness and to change something about me that is lacking, I want to make this Valentines special for someone other than myself.
To my Valentines....
Mr. Giovannoni,
I think you are even more sexy than the day I met you.  I appreciate the ways you make me stretch and grow as a person.  I love your devotion to God and the things you believe are right.  I love that you work hard so I can stay home with our kids. You are a great Daddy!  I love you!
Dylan,
You are so loving and forgiving.  You are so smart, I love that you are passionate about reading books and that your appetite to learn gets bigger and bigger each day.  I love that you are tender and thoughtful.  I love your imagination and creative thinking.  I love you!
Alivia,
You are my work horse!  You are never afraid to roll up your sleeves and get to work.  You are so helpful! You tease and torment, but you also stand up for and defend the things you love.  You always bring drama, spice and entertainment to my life. I love your blue eyes and your curly hair. I love you!
Isaac,
I'm totally smitten with you.  Even when your being terrible naughty I just want to hug/squeeze you until you pop.  I love your cheeks and your big eyes.  I love your go with the flow personality.  I love you!
Mom,
I love you!  I inherited many great characteristics from you.  I love that you are my mother.  I love your goodness and your spunk.  I love your devotion.  I love your determination.  I think you are Beautiful and Wonderful!  Thanks for being a great Grandmother to my kids. 
Dad,
I'm glad you took me fishing and camping with you.  I know I probably drove you crazy.  I'm glad you worked hard to put a roof over my head and provide for my well being.  I'm glad you helped me fix thing when they were broken. I'm glad you  have helped me many times throughout the years.  I'm glad you still take me and my kids camping with you!  I love you!
Heidi Jo,
I look up to you.  You are beautiful, strong, and a great example to me.  You're my own personal Martha Stewart with all your talents and ideas.  I'm glad you were an example of faith to me by living right and getting married in the temple.  You are a fabulous Aunt to my kids.  I love you!
Eric,
You are a great example of love and generosity to me.  You are an example of success, and motivation to me.  I look up to you. I appreciate your thoughtfulness and your humor.  I love that you share your talents with me.  You always inspire me to reach a little further. You are a great Uncle to my kids and a good friend to my husband.   I love you!
Nyles,
I think you have many great talents and skills.  You work hard and you play hard.  You are easy to be around.  You are a great Uncle to my kids.  I love hanging out at your "ranch".  I love you!
Cozy,
You are a good friend.  You always have a compliment to give.  You are thoughtful and kind.  You are beautiful!  You are creative.  You make people feel special.  You are a great Aunt to my kids.  I love you!
Emily,
We all know I'm your favorite sister, and I love you for that!  You will always be my little Emily.  You taught me many things when I was young, you forever changed how I view the world.  You are a great Aunt to my kids.  I love you ("Shimmy")!
To my nieces and nephews,
I love each one of you so much!  I'm so glad I get to be an Aunt to so many wonderful souls.
Grandma (and Grandpa) Benson,
I still have some letters in my drawer from you.  Thanks for always acknowledging me and making me feel special.  Thanks for sharing your wisdom and knowledge.  Thanks for giving me my mother.  Thanks for instilling and teaching me by example so many great characteristics.  I love you!
Grandma "Joe",
Thanks for raising my husband and for giving him love.  Thanks for being so loving and accepting of me. Thanks for your endless generosity.  Thanks for sharing stories with me about your life and sharing with me the lessons you have learned.  You have been a great Great Grandmother to my kids.  I love you!
Diane & Ernie
Two more generous people I have never met!  I am humbled by your example of giving and thoughtfulness.  You have been the most wonderful in-laws!  I love that you shared your gardening skills and space, so I could grow my own garden.  I Love you two!
The Walkers,
Thank you, thank you, for giving my husband the tools he needed to become the man he is today.  Thanks for taking him in and loving him.  Thanks for treating us like family.  Thanks for giving us an example of happiness and love. I love you!
Joe and Jen,
Thanks for being the perfect friends.  I love you!
Mimi, Marcie and Linz,
Thanks for being my friend all these years.  You all have been so good to me.  You all have given me so many happy memories.  I love each of you so much!
Stacie,
You are the best neighbor ever!  Thanks for being my friend.  Thanks for all the countless acts of service.  I love you!
To my visiting teachers,
Past and present.  Thanks for all the time and energy spent in my behalf.  I have made many many friends that I probably wouldn't have otherwise.  I love you!

I hope every one has a Happy Valentines Day!