Dear Isaac

This is your birth story.

I write it mostly for me, but if some day you ever want to know what your birth day was like, I hope you will have this.
I found out I was pregnant with you on July 13 2009. I was super excited!
I began a blog just for you and me, and I tried to write down what I felt and the milestones we reached. I hope to print these journals and put them in a book along with this, so that you can always have the story of your first nine months.
At your 20 week ultrasound, We discovered that you were indeed a little boy, they also discovered that my placenta was low-lying (which just means my placenta was very near my cervix). They advised me to have another ultrasound at 32 weeks to see if my placenta had moved, and we did just that. At your 32 week check up and ultrasound my placenta was still low-lying but Dr. Jones felt that things would work out just fine. They did however discover that my cervix was short and that I had a high risk of delivering you early.
So I made plans to have you early. My body ached like you were coming early.
But apparently you made other plans and you won.
Each of my last four-week check ups was met with teary eyes as Dr. Jones would pat me on the shoulders and tell me I hadn't made any progress.
We scheduled an induction date for the 16th of March and one on the 19th of March in case I chickened out of the first induction date. But when the 16th of March came Alivia came down with a fever, and I felt that maybe if I gave you a few more days you'd come on your own and that our family would be healthier. So I canceled our appointment and did my best to wait for you to come on your own.
On Thursday the 18th I called the hospital to make sure everything was in order for our induction on the 19th, and the hospital told me that I wasn't on the induction list. After a lot of crying and a whole lot of phone calls the hospital called me back and said that there was some kind of mix-up and that I was indeed on the list and to call the hospital around noon the next day to find out when I was to come in.
So I planned for your birth, I packed our bags and found babysitters for your brother and sister.
When we got to my moms house around noon on the 19th I called the hospital to find out if they were ready for us and was told that they were to busy to take me and that our induction had been re-scheduled for Sunday morning. Words cannot describe the utter and total disappointment and despair I felt at that moment. Your dad had taken most of the previous week off since we initially thought we were having you on the 16th, which meant he had to be back at work on Monday. Your Aunt Heidi was up visiting, but she was leaving on Sunday. Babysitters for Dylan and Alivia had to be reacquired, and I couldn't help but cry that nothing was working out.
Eventually I embraced the fact that things weren't going to go my way and I did my best to try and be happy with the hand I was being dealt.
Sunday finally arrived and I checked into the hospital at 7:00 am. They started me on Pitocin right away. Grandma Ward arrived as soon as she could to help me through your birth. You are her 8th grandchild. She has been to every one of my children's births, I feel tremendously lucky to have such a supportive and loving mother, I'm so glad she's my mom!
At 9:30 am Dr. Jones broke my water and by 11:00 am I had asked for an epidural.
I remember with Alivia's birth that the epidural was wonderful, I slept until they woke me up to push. Yours wasn't quite so magical. In the beginning it did a great job of taking away the intense pain I was feeling, but after a while it did little for the enormous amounts of pressure I was feeling. There were times I wondered if I was going to literally explode.
Your heart rate dropped several times and it scared me a lot. But after an hour or so the nurse came in and told me I was ready to go.
You entered this world at 12:57 pm.
All 9 pounds and 1 ounce of you!
You might be interested to know that you were the first child to make me scream during delivery!
And that this is the second time I have delivered a baby just hours after my sister Heidi has left to go back home to Albuquerque.
Grandma Ward got to cut your cord and then I got to take my first look at you.

The next few minutes after your birth were rather scary ones for me. When the nurse started to knead my uterus I felt and heard a gigantic gush. Apparently my uterus wasn't firming up and I was bleeding out. The nurse worked and worked my uterus and finally popped out a softball sized blood clot. They gave me a shot in the leg to help stop the bleeding and they put Pitocin back into my IV to help my uterus contract and firm back up. I didn't see how much blood there actually was but from what I felt, I silently counted my blessings that I was in a hospital, and that I had the blessings of modern medicine on my side and that my children still had a mother.
After a few hours of rest and silent celebration Dad went and picked up Dylan and Alivia from Grandma Diane's and brought them to meet you.
Both Dylan and Alivia loved you from the get-go!
After a long day for the both of us everyone packed up and left us to get some rest.
I got to spend almost all day Monday just getting to know you. We had no visitors and I was just left with the task of figuring out your name. Neither me or your dad had any idea what we were going to name you, we only agreed on two names, the first being Isaac and the second, Tanner.
But the more I held and looked at you, the more I felt that Isaac was more fitting. I wanted very much to give you a middle name that honored your Grandpa Benson but I couldn't make Homer (which was your Grandpa's name) fit. I have however always loved the name Joseph and I know the name has great meaning to your dad too, so we settled on Isaac Joseph.
Every day I hold you I'm in awe. Your sweet spirit has a way of making me ponder who I am and what I need to do to be the best mother to you and your brother and sister. You make me stop and think about all the things I so carelessly toss aside in the rush of life, you make me smile and my heart is so full of love for you. Thanks for coming to this family Isaac Joseph!